Please join us for part two in our series on non-monogamy. This episode is all about self-compassion, but also compassion for our partners within consensual non-monogamous relationships (CNM). So often in Kate’s psychotherapy private practice she sees clients pleading for compassion while concurrently not giving it. And yet, its arguable that compassion is even more important than communication skills within CNM relationships given that even the most stellar communicators will have a crash and burn if compassion isn’t present. First, we discuss self-compassion and the self-work that needs to take place in order for it to be strong. Healing ego states, building positive affect tolerance, and healing attachment injuries are three areas explored. And then we discuss what blocks us from having compassion for our partners. A few such blocks are 1) the need to win, 2) shame spirals, and 3) catastrophizing. For more on CNM and open relationships, check out Kate’s book, Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships which can be purchased wherever books are sold.
About the Hosts:
Sunny Megatron is an award-winning sexuality educator and media personality. She’s the host and executive producer of the Showtime original television series, SEX with Sunny Megatron, plus co-hosts American Sex Podcast and Open Deeply Podcast.
Voted XBIZ 2021 Sexpert of the Year, Kinkly’s Sex Blogging Superhero of 2017, and named one of the 6 most savvy sexologists in North America, Sunny has been featured in Cosmo, Playboy, Buzzfeed, CNN, and more. She is also a contributing editor of XBIZ Premiere Magazine and a regular columnist for Sexual Health Magazine.
In her sell-out sex and kink workshops, Sunny’s unique brand of “edutainment” seamlessly combines her humorous lecturing style, interactive exercises, and the latest sexuality research. Sunny’s passion is helping people become their authentic, sexual selves by learning to overcome shame and shed inhibitions. As a lifestyle BDSM enthusiast, much of her work centers around normalizing alternative sexual practices and ending sexual stigma.
American Sex Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/2HroMhWJnyZbMSsOBKwBnk
TV Show, Sex with Sunny Megatron: https://www.sho.com/sex-with-sunny-megatron/season/1
Kate Loree, LMFT is a sex-positive licensed marriage and family therapist with a specialty in kink, sex worker, LGBTQ and non-monogamous communities. In addition to her Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy, she is also an art therapist, and has a second Masters in Business Administration (MBA). She has been practicing psychotherapy since 2003 and has additional training in EMDR and the Trauma Resiliency Model (TRM) for the treatment of trauma, such as sexual, physical, and emotional abuse. Her first book on compassionate, conscious non-monogamy will be published in April of 2022. She has been featured in Buzzfeed videos, has been a guest on Playboy Radio, and many podcasts such as American Sex, Sex Nerd Sandra, and Sluts and Scholars. She has spoken at universities, such as UCLA, and written for Good Vibrations and Hollywood Magazine. Privately, she has been connected to poly, swing and kink communities since 2003 and understands the hurdles, massive emotional growth, and amazing joy these worlds can provide. Her private practice resides in Encino, CA. For more information, please visit her on the web at KateLoree.com.
Open Deeply podcast is not a replacement for therapy or therapy. Please know this episode has themes of sexual and emotional abuse and neglect. If you catch yourself becoming emotionally overwhelmed by this episode’s content, please get support. Call a friend, therapist, or an emotional support hotline, such as, 800-273-talk (8255).